One of every new mamas main concerns is how to get your baby to sleep. And not just any sleep, but to sleep through the night.
You will hear people say so many different timelines of when a baby first learns to sleep through the night. So first things first - are you comparing apples to apples? It depends what peoples version of "sleeping through the night" actually is. Is this sleeping from 11 pm - 5 am, or is this sleeping 7 pm - 7 am? That is going to be a big factor on the timeline. Second, it depends on the baby. Every baby is different. This doesn't mean that every baby can't sleep through the night, because all babies can. This means that, all babies who are healthy, and developmentally appropriate (i.e. your doctor says you can let them sleep as long as they will now) can. But, the weight gain of babies is very different, and so the age at which you are "allowed" to let your baby start sleeping as long as they can differs. So don't compare your baby's sleep to other babies you see or hear about on the internet. You just can never tell the whole picture through social media and all that comparison is only stealing your joy.
This being said, there are some practical tips to start setting a good sleep foundation right from day one.
When your baby is getting sleepy, and is nice and comfortable, but isn't actually asleep yet, lay them down somewhere safe on their own to actually fall asleep. This will teach them to fall asleep independently. In order for a baby to put itself back to sleep, it has to first know how to fall asleep on its own. This also allows mama to have some hands free time to herself while the baby is asleep so its a win-win.
Watch out for all of the sleepy cues so that you know when to put your baby down. Every baby will have their own cues, for instance my son starts gnawing on his finger. Not sucking his thumb, but gnawing on it like he's going to eat it. But, most babies have a few similar cues that you can look for. Their eyebrows and eyelids get a little red looking when they are tired, and they employ a blank stare off into space as some of the early cues. Look for these cues and you will start to realize when your baby is tired and ready to sleep.
Start a bedtime routine. Your baby won't know what the routine is in the beginning, but if you are consistent and do it every night before bedtime, then they will pick up on the fact that bedtime is coming. For us, that meant book, bottle, bed until our son was old enough to have a daily bath, and then now it is bath, book, bottle and bed. This works for us, but you can do any number of things for a routine. If you're short on time, just start reading the same short book, or sing the same song right before and then there is your routine in only a couple of minutes. The routine doesn't have to be long, but you should employ some "quiet time" before baby goes to sleep. So go in a quiet room instead of having the tv on in the background. All those extra noises provide a baby extra stimuli and its hard for baby to fall asleep when they are trying to take everything in.
Try to keep the baby in the light during the day, and in darkness at night. This means during daytime hours, keep the baby by windows with sunshine coming in, turn on overhead lights, and keep things brighter so they start figuring out their daytime. Then at night time, keep things dark so they know this is nighttime. Try to employ minimal light if you're feeding at night, or changing a diaper or anything else. This way they will start to learn their days from their nights.
Make daytime "funtime" and night-time sleep time. This doesn't mean that your baby can't sleep during the day, because they will, and absolutely should take naps. But it means that during night hours, when your baby wakes up, try to make minimal noise. Baby's most fun activity in the first few weeks is hearing mamas voice so if you're talking or singing to the baby in the middle of the night, they get excited and want to play instead of going back to sleep. Talk, and play during the day. Sleep at night.
Use a sound machine. Make that baby's environment as peaceful as you can by blocking out all of the extra sound so they don't hear the sudden noise disturbances and wake up right away. Just make sure that the sound machine isn't to close to their ears or too loud for them where it can damage their hearing.
Make sure you're getting baby full feedings. Babies wake up if they are hungry. Often when babies eat though, they get tired because it takes so much of their energy to eat, so they start falling asleep before they are finished eating. Try not to let your baby fall asleep while its eating. It sounds mean but make them a little less comfortable while they are eating to keep them awake. You can do this by taking off clothes, so baby isn't as warm and cozy. Or you can tickle the cheeks or toes to try and keep baby awake. You can even sing and try to entertain baby while they are eating so they stay awake. Getting a full feed in, means a full tummy and longer in between meals. Now, this does not mean forcing your baby to eat more than they should be. Baby's tiny little tummy can only hold so much at a time, but as the days go by you will start to realize when baby gets that good full feeding in versus just a snack.
And that's it. All of these things will help set a good sleep foundation for baby for the future, but the rest is up to your baby. The first weeks of having a newborn are exhausting no matter what you do, but hopefully with these sleep tips you can make those just the first few weeks instead of months or years! Just always remember that no matter what, you're doing the best you can, and your baby will get there eventually. To put too much stress or worry on sleep, is just stealing your time and joyful moments with baby while he/she is in the newborn stage. So hold yourself a little higher, give a shout out to all the other mamas out there doing their thing, and carry on with your multi-tasking, kick-ass attitude, because that's all there is left to do and we're all in this together.
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