Going back to work after being out for any period of time is hard. Just like after a long vacation, you find yourself struggling to catch up. Except going back to work after maternity leave, you will never feel caught up again.
Before, you could put in a few extra hours in the evening to catch up on the week or so you missed. Everyone remembers everything that happened, because you were only out a week or so to begin with, so they can easily let you know what happened while you were out. After maternity leave, it's been a bit longer. Whether out for six weeks or six months, your co-workers start to forget what happened while you were out. Since it's hard for me to remember what I had for lunch some days, I can't really blame them for this. Especially since they have been so graciously picking up the slack while I was out enjoying the endorphin releasing snuggles with my new little one. It's still a problem though, because it's hard to catch up on something you don't know happened.
Even if you have meticulous colleagues who wrote down every single thing you missed and filled you in, you still can't catch up. Your to-do list at work is large to begin with, and you have less time to put in to catch up. You're sleep deprived, have a whole other human life to sustain outside of your own, and people are so happy that you're back at work that they give you more items to do. The great news is - you're a value add. The downside is, you will never again feel like you are caught up.
Luckily, I've had some great mama mentors at work that have helped me figure out a few things. First, block off some time on your calendar. This is your baby time and you still want to get that in. Because while it's great to be back in the land of adults and conversation, you'll still miss those baby snuggles and smiles. In a world that is increasingly more connected every day, it's hard to get away from work if you don't block the time and make it a priority. For me, this means picking up my son from daycare, playing for a few minutes, feeding him dinner, and doing his bedtime routine with him all while being unplugged from work. If I didn't get that time, I would be a less productive mama while I am working. Second tip, take a hands on approach. You want to control your calendar more, so make sure you're the one scheduling the meetings. This way, you can fit in meetings when its convenient for you instead of always squeezing things in when you don't want to. Third tip, knock out anything you can get ready for the next day, right after you put baby down to sleep for the night. This means, pack any lunches, get clothes set up, bottles, etc. for baby for the next day so that getting out of the door is easy. This also means, any quick emails, items you can do by yourself for work, you get done on your time, because then your days can be filled with the touchpoints you have to get in with your teams during the normal business day.
Planning is key to a successful working mama day. That doesn't mean it's always going to be seamless. You'll have days where you want to pull your hair out. Days where you get called out of work because your baby is sick and you were supposed to have a presentation. Days where everything seems to go wrong. But if you plan and make the most of your work days while you have the dedicated time, those days can be few and far between. Either way, give yourself grace on the bad days, because you will need it in order to make it to the good days. So hold yourself a little higher, give a shout out to all the other mamas out there doing their thing, and carry on with your multi-tasking, kick-ass attitude, because that's all there is left to do and we're all in this together.
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